Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Farewell to my 20's

Well it is here, the last day of my 20's.  While I don't mourn them per se, I am looking back and seeing how much I have learned in the past 10 years.  I don't feel 30 (you know the 30 you perceived when you were younger, with Mom jeans, sensible shoes, copious amounts of wine, and a general sense of fatigue and world weariness...ok maybe the wine).  How is 30 supposed to feel?  If any of you can tell me that I would greatly appreciate it.  Here are 20 things I learned in my 20's that I would like to share...
1.  I learned to stop hating my forehead and grow out the bangs...with the exception of when I was pregnant and went temporarily insane and thought they would make me look like Heidi Klum, they did not.
2.  I learned that high heels are not for height, they are for perkier buttocks and slimmer looking legs.
3.  I learned that a gay bar is a straight girl's best friend.  The dude's leave you alone and the girls are usually with their partners and leave you alone too.  You get to wear obscene amounts of glitter and it looks normal, and no matter how poorly you dance, no one cares, its all about having fun!
4.  I learned that just because he's fab in the sack, doesn't make him worth it, cause God has a quirky sense of humor.
5.  I learned that it is ok to love someone you don't even know and to measure every other guy against them, It will keep you out of some stupid situations, and put you in some wonderful ones...usually involving twitter, NYC, and the world's best pick up line.
6.  I learned that the person you loved when you entered your 20's can take most of them to get over, but on the other side you might learn a lesson.
7.  I learned strippers don't like being bitten
8.  I learned to MOISTURIZE, MOISTURIZE, MOISTURIZE
9.  I learned that when you start to get the spins...STOP DRINKING!  It only gets worse from there.
10.  I learned Vanilla Ice is super fun to do Jaegar Bombs with.
11.  I learned that the guy that comes to your house to watch movies with you, is always there when you need him, and makes you smile, he's the one you should be with...not the douche-bag that never returns your calls, and if you miss your chance, it will probably never come again.
12.  I learned that Mom is usually right...as is Cara.
13.  I learned to enjoy my own company, you will spend much time alone, dinners, movies, holidays, and birthdays.  And it is ok.
14.  I learned that to live and not to breathe is to die in tragedy (Thank you GD).
15.  I learned that the Muppets teach important life lessons.
 16.  I learned that my butt is a good thing.
17.  I learned that no matter how old you are, getting someone to pull your finger is STILL HILARIOUS!
18.  When it fits, buy them ALL!  Every color, in multiples.  True fit is a rarity.
19.  Buying yourself flowers is not pathetic.  Making yourself happy is a GREAT thing.
20.  No matter what, believe in yourself, true friends and love are hard to find, and treasure everything you have all the time because it can all be gone in an instant.
Love, Lola
Dancing into my 30's






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